Jarren Duran Finally Finds the Detonator Button, Payton Tolle Carries the Furniture, and the Red Sox Win a Game They Tried Very Hard to Turn Into a Garage Fire
Behind Payton Tolle’s seven-inning gem, Jarren Duran’s three-run seventh-inning homer, and just enough late-inning stomach acid to remind this team still enjoys emotional vandalism.
The Red Sox Are Now 14–21, Which Is Technically Progress, the Same Way Crawling Out of a Dumpster Counts as Exercise
The Boston Red Sox won a baseball game Monday night. Yes, legally. It counts. Nobody can take it away unless MLB launches a new “vibes review” system, in which case this franchise is getting escorted out of the building in zip ties.
Game 35…
