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The Red Sox Win a Baseball Game, Alert the Authorities

James Dalfino's avatar
James Dalfino
May 02, 2026
∙ Paid

The Boston Red Sox beat the Houston Astros 3-1 at Fenway Park on Friday night, and for one blessed evening, the operation looked like an actual Major League Baseball team instead of a group of guys trying to assemble a patio set with missing screws.

Your Boston Red Sox are now 13-19, sitting 8 games behind the Yankees in the AL East, because apparently t…

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