Red Sox Get Shut Out By Blue Jays, Somehow Lose To A Bullpen Day Like It Was a Federal Holiday
Boston goes 0-for-12 with runners in scoring position, strands 13, and reminds everyone that “opportunity” is just a fancy word for pain.
The Boston Red Sox lost to the Toronto Blue Jays 3-0 on Wednesday night at Fenway Park, and honestly, this game should be placed in a museum under the exhibit titled: “How To Waste Everyone’s Evening In Three Hours Or Less.”
Toronto didn’t even have Max Scherzer. Scherzer was supposed to start, then got scratched and landed on the injured list with back spasms. So the Blue Jays basically walked into Fenway, looked around, said, “Anybody here know how to pitch?” and seven guys from the bullpen raised their hands like it was open mic night at a Moose Lodge.
And naturally, the Red Sox offense treated them like the 1998 Braves.
Boston had chances. Oh, they had chances. They had seven hits. They drew seven walks. They had 13 runners left on base. They went 0-for-12 with runners in scoring position, which is not a stat line — that’s a cry for help. That’s the kind of number you see and immediately start checking if the team plane accidentally landed in Worcester and the WooSox were wearing big-league uniforms.
Jake Bennett Did His Job, Which Was Apparently Against Club Policy
Here’s the maddening part: Jake Bennett actually pitched well.
The rookie lefty went 5 1/3 innings, allowed just three hits, two earned runs, walked nobody, and struck out five. That’s a perfectly respectable start. That’s the kind of outing where a normal baseball team says, “Thank you, young man, here’s some run support.”
The Red Sox said, “Best we can do is spiritual abandonment.”
Bennett gave Boston a chance to win. The offense responded by standing around the bases like confused tourists at Faneuil Hall trying to figure out where the clam chowder line starts.
Andrés Giménez Turned Fenway Into His Personal Track Meet
Andrés Giménez was the Blue Jays’ entire offense, cardio department, and emotional support demon. He had two hits, scored twice, drove in a run, and stole three bases.
Three steals.
At Fenway.
Against the Red Sox.
This was not baseball. This was a man doing sprints while Boston watched like a bunch of substitute gym teachers. Toronto stole five bases total, which is the kind of thing that makes you wonder if the Red Sox defense was operating on dial-up internet.
Giménez opened the scoring in the third with an RBI single. Vladimir Guerrero Jr. followed with an RBI groundout to make it 2-0. Then in the eighth, Vlad added another RBI single, because apparently even a 2-0 deficit against this offense felt like Toronto wanted to install a backup generator.
The Red Sox Offense: Now With More Nothing
The Sox were not no-hit. That would’ve been cleaner. More dramatic. At least then you could say, “Wow, what pitching.”
No, this was worse.
This was the Red Sox repeatedly getting people on base and then immediately turning into a group of dads trying to assemble patio furniture without instructions. Every time they had a chance, the bats shriveled up like a beach chair in November.
Seven walks should be a gift. Seven hits should be enough to accidentally score a run. You should trip over a run at some point. Somebody should blink wrong and knock one in.
Instead, Boston manufactured zero runs with the precision of a Swiss watch built entirely out of wet napkins.
Fenway Park: Where Hope Goes To Get Mugged
The Red Sox are now 29-42. They’re 15.5 games behind the Yankees. They’ve lost three straight. They are 12-24 at home, which means Fenway Park has gone from “America’s Most Beloved Ballpark” to “The World’s Most Expensive Group Therapy Session.”
This team continues to find new ways to make losing feel artisanal. Handcrafted. Small batch. Locally sourced incompetence.
You had a rookie pitcher give you a chance. You had Toronto scrambling after losing its scheduled starter. You had traffic on the bases all night. And still, the scoreboard looked like someone forgot to plug in the Red Sox side.
Final Thoughts
This was a brutal loss because it was so avoidable. Not a blowout. Not a buzzsaw. Not some ace mowing everyone down.
A bullpen day.
A seven-pitcher parade.
A game where the Red Sox had 14 combined hits and walks and somehow scored the same number of runs as a folding chair.
The Blue Jays didn’t dominate Boston. Boston simply walked into its own kitchen, opened every cabinet, found food everywhere, and still ordered sadness for dinner.
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Because apparently somebody has to watch this team strand runners, and it might as well be us.